What is fear?

When one is suddenly deprived of the rock you have been clinging to in the bubbling and boiling stream of life, the fear can literally kill you. You go under, you bob up to the surface, you get tumbled head over heals, you grab at stuff around you to try to keep afloat, can’t find the air to breath and then … you discover your own strength. You become your own stabilising rock. Suddenly you find you have a grip on the sand beneath your feet and you are … ok. Still a long way from the bank of this white water river of life but much closer than you thought you were before.

I have members of my family who are devout Christians and they have worried about me and my belief system for years! The one thing that they never understood was that my belief system is the tool that brings me so much closer to what they call God. In fact, this morning I found God. Or rather, I have come to understand what God is. Mark my words : ‘what’ God is. You see, I have never been able to believe in a Moses-like figure sitting on a cloud throne staring with fiery eyes at its subjects … just waiting for one of them to misbehave and then to dish out the punishment.

No, no white-bearded figure in flowing robes for me.

My God is the humming field of impossible and unimaginable possibilities in the infinity of space/time folding back upon itself in self-perpetuation, ever expanding, ever alive from unimaginable beginning to unimaginable end. You see, it was never born and can therefore never die.

For many years I have been deeply interested in finding answers to the three soul questions:

1. Who am I?
2. What do I want?
3. What is my purpose?

One of my tools held the key: Meditation.

A friend asked me about a week ago: Why do you meditate? What does it mean to you?

Hmm … I thought – where do I begin? And then it came to me. The answer is that during meditation, sitting in silence, I lock into that field of Infinite Possibilities and find any answer to any question I might have. If it doesn’t come immediately, I leave it in that field and before long, it bears fruit which I’m able to harvest. You see, that field is the most fertile field to plant any seed in.

And the more I meditate, the easier it becomes to lock into the grid and like dropping a pebble into a still pond, the ripples bring the harvest. Except my grid moves in waves; imagine The Matrix (as in the film of the same name) and you have an idea of what I’m talking about. Then, out of the grid, pops (literally – on a virtual level) bits of the grid itself which, if left alone, manifests in the answer I was seeking.

And that is exactly what we all should do with FEAR – have a SODA:

O OBSERVE that moment of fear
D DETACH from it by taking a step back and looking again
A AWAKEN to new possibilities … in that infinite field

For me at least, it works. When I feel the fear, I STOP and remind myself that I AM NOT the fear. The fear is something outside of me. I then OBSERVE what the fear really is and detach from it. It is at that moment that I am able to hand it over to my Higher Self, my grid, my field of possibilities and let it go. My Christian friends would call that ‘prayer’ – only, I know what I’m addressing. Each and every one of us is an interwoven part of that grid; every molecule in the Universe a miracle in itself.

One other thing that I find invaluable is BREATHING. The more oxygen you can take into your lungs, the better your brain is able to function and therefore you stand a better chance of gaining clarity.

If you should be interested in learning more about this technique – which took me about 35 years to master – let me know and I’ll take you on a journey of exploration.

I would like to acknowledge three key figures in my life who have been incredibly instrumental in helping me find my way in life. They are Seon Bishop-McDermott, my bestest friend of so many years ago who helped me put my foot on the first step of this long yellow brick road. The other two are Dr. Deepak Chopra and the man whose voice I’m addicted to, Davidji.

BBC2 is running a programme at present called The Wonders of Life, presented by Professor Brian Cox – it is stunning! It also, on a physics level, talk about exactly what I have mentioned above.

May your God go with you.

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